Everyone wants to be happy. Some people actively look for happiness or blame others when they don’t seem to find it. But where is it? Is it that perfect car or perfect house you’ve always wanted? Will that make you happy or your life perfect? Or will you just bring your miserable self with you in which case you will just be an unhappy driver while driving a perfect car?
I have always been a happy person or at least a super positive person. I never run out of goals. Part of my happiness, maybe, is fulfilling those small menial everyday goals in life. (Ex. “Today I will finish the laundry!” or “This month I will pay off that credit card bill!”) Though some may set larger, more inanimate goals. (Ex. “This year, I will find myself a good husband/wife.”) But are you sure that will make you happy? What happens if you meet someone who is super needy and incapable of making themself happy, then what? You will spend all your time self-doubting yourself and never really being able to find happiness anywhere because your life will be filled with their inability to be satisfied with their own life. You may be better off alone.
Now let’s talk about being alone…do we all recognize the difference between feeling alone and feeling lonely? As a teacher, I used to explain to my students that feeling alone is something you feel when you are by yourself with no one else home. But feeling lonely is an emotion that you can feel even when there are 10 people with you. You feel isolated emotionally, as though no one can understand you or your plight in life enough to be able to emotionally support you. That’s loneliness with a capital “L.” But what if you don’t let anyone in? What if you are incapable of sharing with the people around you, the things that make you tick? The things that excite you or stress you or make you happy/sad? You are incapable of “sharing” those minor details with other people. Well, if you are feeling lonely or isolated after having shut everyone out, then, I’m sorry, but then you cannot blame anyone else but yourself for feeling lonely. Consider opening up…good and bad. It’s only fair.
Life is a two way street. In order to have friends or significant others, you have to give in to certain things. I remember I had a friend once who explained how much he hated camping. But he started dating someone who was a camping freak…so you know what, he started going camping to make his girlfriend happy. And do you know what, he actually discovered that he loved camping! It ended up making him happy. When in a relationship, frequently we are faced with doing things that we are not accustomed to, and even after having done them with our significant other, we still may not see the attraction…but isn’t it nice to see your significant other happy? Isn’t that enough of a reason to do something…even if it is a dreaded camping trip where you spend all night with wet feet and wake up with 20 mosquito bites?
That, my friend, is what looking beyond the imperfections is all about!